Music I can't live without

Name of the band I'm currently obssessing over: Dire Straits.

What you need to know: They're British, hard core into long, meaningful songs, and are classic Rock Gods!!!! Yeah I didn't know it either until recently.

Essential love song: Romeo and Juliet.

Essential sad song: Brothers in Arms.

Essential Rock out and Dance song: Sultans of Swing.

A little unknown/well know (back in day) fact: They were the first band to ever appear on MTV. They are that cool.

Check this out if you don't believe their brillance....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k5JkHBC5lDs

"You are the music while the music lasts." ~ T. S. Eliot

Review of July Books (Pt 1)

The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

5/5 stars

This French children's book was a sweet tribute to the magic of imagination that so marks each of our life's beginnings and which the authors laments, is forgotten and put off for 'adult' things much too soon. The book is filled with all the best that is in children-- hope, mystery, simplicity, and faith, and it reminds us that we have much more to learn from children than they do from us.

Interestingly enough, the author chooses as his hero/philosopher a young, alien boy who is both a stranger to earth life and adulthood. Through him, we re-learn the basic truths we once knew as children; that truth lies in the heart and not the eyes, that individual knowledge and discovery comes only through truly knowing and living in the world around us, that imagination will always push us further than reason, and that love is definitively linked with responsibility, for to love is to care enough to be responsible for something or someone.

The tone of the story is often sad, but it is a sadness that is bittersweet. Written while his home country was occupied by Germany, it is no wonder the author sought to tell a story that makes you smile, laugh, cry, think, feel, love, question, and know. A story that hints at the beauty of life, while all the time reminding us of the truth of grief and of death. A story that is, much like life, at once bitter and sweet.

Bastard Out of Carolina by Dorothy Allison

4.5/5 stars

This book is one of the hardest books I've ever read. Let me explain. The book centers on Bone, a girl of illegitimate birth who is officially branded by her birth certificate a 'bastard' child. As she grows up, readers are introduced to an array of family members, all of which are the typical Southern degenerates; there are Bone's alcoholic uncles who are in and out of prison, her cousins who steal cars and break into stores, and her grandma who chews tobacco, is without teeth, and is a blasphemous heathen. All of whom are described in such a funny and loving way as to render their obvious flaws obsolete next to their more redeeming qualities. Through their displays of passionate filial loyalty, Bone's family protects and provides unselfishly for each other, oftentimes to their own physical detriment.

What makes the book so hard to read is that much of the book is filled with Bone's struggles against her stepfather, who abuses her physically, emotionally, and sexually. Even tougher, are the questions the authors poses to readers throughout the family saga: What defines a mother's love? Is love an unconditional emotional response? Which is more necessary-filial love or romantic love? In the end, does love, or at least the things we do for love, engender more evil than good?

The book is poignantly beautiful in a way that is darkly haunting (I'll never forget the ending). It tells of love and family, but in a way that renders both disturbing. It tells of the best and worst in us all, and it tells it uncensored, uninhibited, and unapologetically. Read it. If only to understand the dark, and in that dark, to see brief shades of light.

My foray into the rain

Seeing as I don't have much of a social life (outside of the family) here in Singapore, I've found that I get really happy about small things. Like when my dad brought us donuts from Malaysia last night. Or when Anna and I pretended to be gymnasts/yoga enthusiasts.
Two nights ago it started raining. For Singapore, that is pretty normal. At some point during almost every day here it will rain for a couple of hours. And its not light rain either...it usually gets really dark and windy, with thunder and lightening going on in the not so comfortable distance. But that night there wasn't either, and it was raining so hard that when I went outside it almost hurt. I had just finished a 800 page book that I had spent the last 2 days almost reading straight and was feeling the extra energy from laying around. So I ran outside without shoes in the dark and walked, ran, hopped, and splashed my way through it all. It was actually a really strange experience to be clothed, in crazy wet weather, with the streets completely deserted. I loved it. It was one of the rare moments in modern life where you can actually focus enough on a single thing to really experience it fully. No distractions. I felt connected to both the moment and the earth, which I know sounds a little crazy. By the end of it all, I felt the happiest I've felt in awhile and was very close to forgoing my obsession with civilization in general and moving to some forsaken wood or abandoned tundra. Then I remembered Into the Wild, and my lack of survival know-how and decided if I wanted to live I had better stay in civilization for now.
But the dream is still there.

The Rest of my LIFE

I'm trying very hard to be positive about life. As of right now, I am unemployed, living with my parents, broke, and a all-out loner. The problem is I didn't think this whole moving to Singapore thing over. In fact, I didn't think about it much at all. I was a lost college student, and now I'm just a lost person with NO IDEA what to do with my life. There are just too many options. Do I go to Grad school, do I find a job, can I find a job, where to live, who with...the ultimate questions remains- what the hell do I want?

So far I know that I want to

1. be independent



2. make money



3. live somewhere other than Utah
   

That's about it. Which I know is quite sad, but I can't help it. I just don't know! Here's what I could see myself doing...

1. Getting a M.A. (See image)

2. Joining the Peace Corps

3. Being a Successful Editor/Journalist/Writer in New York

4. Saying F' it all and moving to Europe where I become some low-level farmer/street vendor/bartender (well hopefully it won't come to that)

So I would enjoy all of your opinions (if you have any) so I can wisely make one of the most important decisions of my life. My fate is in your hands.

Photos Galore

Random photos I found...enjoy

On Being Interviewed

I had a job interview yesterday that was quite stressful. It was at a publishing company based out of Singapore that specializes in business deals, magazines, articles, etc. It actually is a pretty eclectic company...among their clients are a Lebanese restaurant, a children's book company, a local mosque, a temple in Thailand, etc.
But anyway, back to the stress. The woman called me the day before the actual interview, and told me she wanted to see my portfolio. The problem was I didn't have one and didn't even know how to begin. An hour after I recieved the call, I had already bought paper and a green plastic case/portfolio cover. I decided on the green one because I thought it looked like it belonged to someone who was creative but not overly creative. (like Van Gogh with the whole ear thing or Woolf and her little trip to the local river creative)
After I bought the supplies I figured I'd done enough for the night (work and productivity are not my strongest character traits) and decided to watch Buffy the Vampire Slayer instead of work on my portfolio.
The next morning I woke up quite early because my ac unit kept shutting on and off and beeping incessantly at me. When I was coherent enough, I realized that the power was what was really making everything else shut on and off. I ended up putting my portfolio together amidst ac guys everywhere, constant power loss, and the increasing panic I was feeling about my first ever real job interview.
I did get everything together in time. When I actually made it in the doors of the company, their policy of no shoes in the office (all the shoes were lined up neatly in the front) and my interviewer's sweet, brace covered smile made me feel relaxed and more in my element.
I believe the interview went well, although I often hate the person I become when I'm being interviewed. I smile too much, look too eager, desperate or both, and always answer questions quickly and remotely. I talk about myself without revealing myself, and often forget the question that was asked in the middle of answering it.
Regardless, I did get through both it and the evil written portion of the interview 'test', which made me feel like a unprepared student again. The questions I had to answer were absolutely horrible, including: "Describe a day in your life" and "explain why freedom requires responsibility." Yeah, I didn't have much to work with.
The moral of the interview- never use college essay prompts when attempting to hire a good writer.

The Function of Blogging and MY relation in the Blogosphere

I have a blog. Yeah I know its all the craze now and I'm being totally a poser for starting one. But after much pondering, perusing, and panhandling (I'm mostly kidding) I have decided to become a productive member of the blogosphere (yes it is a word...I was an English major). Or whatever. I'd like to say enjoy, but in all honestly, this blog will probably turn into

1. A place in which I have a nerdy one-sided discussions about the merits of such and such book (with myself of course)
2. A public forum where I discuss personal details about myself that probably shouldn't be printed anywhere let alone (need I be redundant) on a PUBLIC forum
or..
3. A tech-savvy personals ad (I am looking for a man with a big...)

All of which, I know, are making you all hot and bothered and wanting more. If so....read on, but don't say I didn't warn you.